Monday, September 6, 2010
 

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Daddy Discipline

 

Keep your sense of humor. Discipline is not what you do when there's a problem. Discipline is what you do from the time your child wakes up to the time your child goes to sleep. You know the secret to great parenting is in your personal relationship with your child and in the quirkiness of what it means to be in your family. Enjoy yourself. Enjoy your child. If it's not fun at the moment, work on changing what's not working but don't lose site of what really matters.

Wait till Daddy gets home. Daddy's arrival is something wonderful not a dread-filled threat. Dad cannot be the lone discipline "enforcer". Discipline issues must be handled in the moment for maximum effectiveness. Some issues do need to be discussed by both parents. It's okay to say, "I'm not happy with the report that I received from your teacher today. I want your dad to be involved in this and we can all talk about it later." It's not okay to portray one parent as powerless.

Fun-Parent is not enough. Parents must balance all of their parenting roles: playful optimist, hopeful teacher, trustworthy confidant, dependable guide, resourceful ally, and fun-loving companion. If you feel yourself slipping into a one-dimensional role, rebalance quickly. You are your children's role models for adulthood. Claim your rightful authority to set rules and your children will have the opportunity to claim appropriate power in their lives. They will grow-up with self-control and the ability to make a valuable contribution to the world.

Make it Just-Right Discipline. Discipline is an on-going process that is constantly shifting to keep up with new ages and stages in development. Unfortunately for those adults who like a universal action plan, discipline must be custom-fit to each child, and sometimes to each situation. Parents must redefine how they teach according to what their children need to learn. And so, the best "daddy discipline" comes right out the story of The Three Bears - it shouldn't be too soft and it shouldn't be too hard. With practice, it will be "just right"!

 

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About the Author

Karen Deerwester is a parent, educator, and the owner of Family Time Coaching & Consulting, inspiring and supporting parents and professionals in all aspects of "living with children". Her most recent book, The Entitlement-Free Child, helps parents navigate in a "Me! Mine! Now!" culture. Karen has appeared on MSNBC, NBC and NPR as well as in Parents and Parenting magazines. Check out her website. 

Other Articles by Karen Deerwester:



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