How To "Get Along" With Your Teen

Consistency counts. Doing something enjoyable together on a regular basis is a good way to give a relationship some positive stimulation. Often activities have to be planned in advance, which can provide other benefits. If two people know that they are going to do something pleasant together on the weekend, this knowledge will tend to produce a "backup effect." The idea will help them get along better Monday through Friday.

No martyrdom allowed. Avoid doing things that your teen likes and you hate. If you are not having a good time at a rock concert, for example, your teen will notice. The two of you may then argue or snipe at one another, and the whole experience may become worse than doing nothing at all. Although it isn't always easy, the two of you want to find something that you can both enjoy at the same time.

The sure thing? Is there anything an adolescent and his middle-aged parent can enjoy together? The closest to a sure thing is going to a movie and then getting something to eat afterward. It's not that difficult to find a movie you can both enjoy, and if you're not getting along too well to begin with, this idea also has the advantage that you don't have to talk to each other during the show.Afterward, while you're eating, you can at least discuss the movie.

What if your youngster refuses to do anything with you? Try not to act hurt or insulted. Remember that the kid's main job during adolescence is to get ready to leave home for good. Be patient, and don't take it personally. Try again some other time.

Good luck!

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